Kylie Cooke

So much of motherhood is about giving. How do you refill your creative cup? Are there certain environments, people, or rituals that help you reconnect with yourself?

Honestly, I’m still learning the art of nourishing myself. It’s easy to get stuck in the weeds of motherhood and end up trying to pour from an empty cup. I’m working on giving myself permission to be imperfect and reminding myself that I’m doing my best with what I’ve got. I’ve found perimenopause and menopause to be very challenging seasons to mother through, so making self-care a priority is something I work on daily.

Alone time, without anyone needing anything from me, really helps. I’m trying to incorporate meditation as a new practice. I'm an active relaxer and really struggle to be still.

Being in nature and walking the beautiful beach that’s on our doorstep is a regular micro retreat. A relatively new ritual I’ve embraced since returning to Aotearoa is playing pickleball. I've always loved racket sports and played lots of tennis and padel when we lived in Bali. There's something very satisfying about simply hitting a ball, honing a skill, being active, and being part of a community.

The freedom and inspiration of travel fueled my creativity & hustle for Only Lovers & I’ve noticed since returning to a more structured environment, it has altered my workflow, and I’ve found keeping it all going a lot harder. Right now I’m taking a little hiatus while we settle back into NZ life and giving myself the opportunity to recalibrate & reconnect.

How does being a mother inform your decisions as you navigate life?

When I became a mother, suddenly my child's needs became the compass for my choices. I’ve found that motherhood demands creative problem solving and flexibility that affects broader life decisions. A large part of choosing to take time out from regular programming and go on an adventure was driven by wanting to expose Foxy to different ways of living, to show him cultures outside of the Western norms and to prioritise connecting as a family. Travelling the world during a global pandemic forced us to always be open and to embrace uncertainty and to make decisions that best align with our family values.

What kind of world do you hope Foxy grows up in, and how are you shaping that through the way you show up as a mother, woman, and creative?

My greatest hope is for Foxy to grow up in a world where his emotional intelligence, self-belief and creativity are valued and he is comfortable, unashamedly being his whole self. I try to show up and model effort over perfection, to apologise when I mess up, so he sees that it's safe to make mistakes. And to set clear boundaries with kindness and care, and explain the “why” behind our family's rules. My hope is that by prioritising connection over correction, we can give him lifelong tools to navigate the world with heart.